Gay Weddings are Good for Business

Many people see the Episcopal Church as the closest thing there is to the Catholic Church. Which is why their increasingly progressive stance on same-sex marriage gives me hope. This week, the National Cathedral in Washington D.C. announced that same-sex marriage ceremonies could be performed there. The National Cathedral is the second largest Cathedral in the country and dubbed by Congress as the “National House of Prayer.” It’s a symbol of Christian faith in America. And now it lets the gays marry. The Episcopal Church has become increasingly progressive in the U.S. and is the largest U.S. denomination to support same-sex marriage. We all know Bishop Robinson was named the first openly gay Bishop of an Episcopal diocese in the U.S. when he was named New Hampshire Bishop in 2003. Several other dioceses in New England have permitted same-sex marriage for a few years now. And last year, the Church itself said that priests could bless same-sex relationships – not the same as marriage but we’ll take it. 

With any industry, it's important to know your market when defining your client base and establishing your marketing plan.  If you want to reach the lucrative gay and lesbian wedding market, knowing the needs of this market is no different.  But beyond the broad "gay and lesbian wedding market", there are a bunch of sub-groups.  For example:

• Older gay and lesbian couples will be attracted to a different set of images, a different style of website and different company values than a younger couple.
• Gay male couples will be attracted to different types of images and language than lesbian couples.
• and then there are sub-cultures within these groups (ie, leather bears) but I won't go into detail about that.

Since gay marriage became legal in Massachusetts seven years ago, I've been watching what happens in other states as it becomes legal there.  Here's what you should expect when gay marriage first becomes legal:

The first day gay marriage was legal in the District of Columbia, at least 37 same-sex couples applying for marriage licenses were from the State of Maryland.  And that was just the first day.

Since Maryland now recognizes gay marriages performed in other states, same-sex couples from Maryland will naturally go to D.C. first and foremost for their gay wedding plans and spend their gay wedding dollars in the District rather than over the border in Maryland.  The Wedding Report indicates that the average cost of a wedding in D.C. is twice the national average, at around $42,000.

Virginia, to D.C.'s south, doesn't recognize these same-sex marriages at all, so is truly missing a big financial windfall - but at the same time, their residents are less likely to marry in DC because their marriages won't be recognized when they return.

Maryland's new policy is great news for its gay and lesbian residents but the state's economy is missing a lucrative opportunity.

Have you seen same-sex couples from Maryland prepare for big weddings in DC now that gay marriage is recognized?

Gay divorce?  Unthinkable!  But as goes gay marriage so goes gay divorce.  There were some interesting bits of news this week regarding gay divorce.  Let's check it out:

News Across the U.S.

• Marriage equality activists in Maryland are reluctant to push for full legal marriage, despite the Attorney General's declaration that the state recognize gay marriages performed elsewhere.  Activists are worried that the timing isn't right and any attempt to push for gay marriage will backfire and lead to an outright ban.
• An attempted impeachment of that same Attorney General of Maryland (on the grounds that he was neglectful in his decision) failed this week.
• Gay marriage has been legal in Iowa for a year now and there's very little support for its ban.
• D.C. has seen a massive spike in marriage applications since gay marriage became legal there.  D.C. has the highest percentage of gay couples in the country.  This month there were 1100 marriage applications, about six times the norm.
• The U.S. Census was due this week.  This is the first year that gay couples will be counted.  Although the Census does not specifically ask if one is gay or lesbian, you can designate yourself as married if you consider yourself as such (even if you're not legally married.)
• A retired Presbyterian minister who lives in California faces the church court because she performed some gay marriage ceremonies.
• In Pennsylvania, a state which does recognize gay marriage and where it's not legal, a court ruled that a lesbian couple married in Massachusetts cannot divorce in Pennsylvania. One of these spouses will need to establish residency in Massachusetts in order to officially divorce.  This situation is a side-effect of the Defense of Marriage Act.
• The opposite situation happened in Texas this week, with a couple married in Massachusetts, allowed to divorce in Texas.  How can same-sex divorce be legal in Texas when marriage is not?  That is the question of the hour and this case is likely to reach the Texas Supreme Court.

As the news became official that the District of Columbia was going to legalize gay marriage, a startup company called GLBT Wedding Services created an event designed to set the Guinness world record of the most number of couples married at the same time.  The previous record was 168 straight couples and the company was aiming for 400 same-sex couples.  It's a very sweet idea and if it worked, would have been pretty cool to see.

Unfortunately, only 10 couples participated.

There's a lesson in this that should be noted as gay marriage becomes legal in other places.   Mike Crawford says it best in this Washington Post article:  "We have been waiting a long time for gay couples to be able to marry, so people are focused on creating events that are going to be really special," says Mike Crawford, co-chairman of DC for Marriage. "And it's hard to be special when you're getting married with hundreds of couples you don't know."

The bottom line is this - gay marriage is rare, sacred and historic.  There aren't very many places where it's legal and only roughly 10% of the population is LGBT.  Gay couples aren't to be tokenized as gay marriage becomes legal.  Marriage is an important institution.  It means something special.  

And you have to be authentic to reach this market.  

How do you feel about large group marriages - even if you're straight?  Is that something you would ever do?

Gay marriage is official in DC and has been for a few weeks now.  Jobs are expected to be created by the increase in revenue to the Capital. Yes, that's right:  the gay wedding industry is so strong that it can create jobs.  Here's more you should know:

This is the week that gay marriage began in the nation's capital.  Truly a historic day.  Let's start with that and explore the other gay marriage and wedding news of the week!

It seemed like there was something newsworthy about gay marriage every day this week, with the highlight being the decision in Maryland.  Read on to see what I mean:

This is the second post in a new weekly Friday blog series on gay weddings and gay marriage in the news: